1
00:00:02,896 --> 00:00:03,931
Well, thanks for coming.

2
00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:05,896
And tell your friends
they'’re welcome to come

3
00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:07,862
and discuss their
husbands, their boyfriends

4
00:00:07,931 --> 00:00:09,620
and their husbands'’ boyfriends.

5
00:00:09,689 --> 00:00:10,827
What is it about coffee

6
00:00:10,896 --> 00:00:12,689
that makes people
want to spill their guts?

7
00:00:12,758 --> 00:00:14,827
I Don'’t know, but those
guts are going to buy me

8
00:00:14,896 --> 00:00:17,137
an outside cabin on
a Caribbean cruise.

9
00:00:17,206 --> 00:00:19,000
Yeah, this little
beverage venture of yours

10
00:00:19,068 --> 00:00:20,148
does seem to be paying off.

11
00:00:20,206 --> 00:00:21,137
Yes, it does.

12
00:00:21,206 --> 00:00:23,137
This month I may
actually turn my first profit.

13
00:00:23,206 --> 00:00:24,137
Whoo-hoo!

14
00:00:24,206 --> 00:00:26,068
I mean, Ka-ching.

15
00:00:26,137 --> 00:00:28,655
I just wish I didn'’t have to
wait until the end of the month

16
00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:29,793
to see if I made a profit.

17
00:00:29,862 --> 00:00:30,965
Wait a minute, I Don'’t.

18
00:00:31,034 --> 00:00:33,000
I'’ll just call in my
profit prophet, Harvey.

19
00:00:35,103 --> 00:00:37,103
Your profit prophet
is a big bunny?

20
00:00:37,172 --> 00:00:38,862
Oops. Wrong Harvey.

21
00:00:40,551 --> 00:00:42,517
Really wrong Harvey.

22
00:00:42,586 --> 00:00:44,206
Hi, Harvey. How you doing?

23
00:00:44,275 --> 00:00:46,655
You know i'’ve been thinking
about you a lot recently and...

24
00:00:46,724 --> 00:00:47,896
No time for chitchat.

25
00:00:49,068 --> 00:00:50,689
Finally.

26
00:00:50,758 --> 00:00:53,103
Sabrina, meet Harvey,
the profit prophet.

27
00:00:53,172 --> 00:00:55,206
Hi. Nice staff.

28
00:00:55,275 --> 00:00:57,137
Yes, the ladies seem to like it.

29
00:00:57,206 --> 00:00:58,931
So, Harvey, is hilda'’s

30
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,310
going to be showered
with shekels by the 30th?

31
00:01:01,379 --> 00:01:03,000
Let'’s have a look-see.

32
00:01:04,758 --> 00:01:07,793
Nothing is coming.

33
00:01:07,862 --> 00:01:10,206
You mean nothing'’s
coming for free.

34
00:01:10,275 --> 00:01:11,551
Oh, so I guess

35
00:01:11,620 --> 00:01:13,896
he'’s not a non-profit prophet.

36
00:01:13,965 --> 00:01:16,310
So what'’s the deal, am I
going to make money or not?

37
00:01:16,379 --> 00:01:20,758
Not if you keep
piddling it away like this.

38
00:01:22,206 --> 00:01:23,655
Next time I go with Isaiah.

39
00:01:30,034 --> 00:01:34,517
♪ Life'’s changing around me,
and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪

40
00:01:34,586 --> 00:01:40,586
♪ i'’m reaching out and
living by my rules... ♪

41
00:01:40,655 --> 00:01:44,172
♪ Time'’s moving way too fast ♪

42
00:01:44,241 --> 00:01:48,103
♪ I wanna make it last...

43
00:01:50,310 --> 00:01:53,758
♪ '’cause i'’m out
on my own now ♪

44
00:01:53,827 --> 00:01:58,137
♪ and I like the way it feels.

45
00:02:12,206 --> 00:02:13,379
I can'’t believe this.

46
00:02:13,448 --> 00:02:14,896
I'’ve already got a
ton of homework.

47
00:02:14,965 --> 00:02:16,827
How am I supposed to
write a five-page essay

48
00:02:16,896 --> 00:02:19,379
on Hamlet'’s speech as
a window to his madness?

49
00:02:19,448 --> 00:02:20,896
What about the
window to mymadness?

50
00:02:20,965 --> 00:02:21,965
I'’m swamped, too.

51
00:02:22,034 --> 00:02:23,413
I have to write a
paper on Picasso

52
00:02:23,482 --> 00:02:25,275
then study for my exams
on organic chemistry

53
00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:26,517
and comparative religions.

54
00:02:26,586 --> 00:02:27,586
How do you do all this

55
00:02:27,620 --> 00:02:29,241
and fit in baseball
practice every day?

56
00:02:29,310 --> 00:02:30,724
I'’ve learned to multi-task.

57
00:02:30,793 --> 00:02:32,172
I'’m on my way to
the batting cages

58
00:02:32,241 --> 00:02:34,206
and i'’m bringing my
audio version of the koran.

59
00:02:34,275 --> 00:02:35,862
See ya. Later.

60
00:02:35,931 --> 00:02:37,137
Hey, how'’s it going?

61
00:02:37,206 --> 00:02:39,344
About as well as nervous
breakdown 101 can go.

62
00:02:39,413 --> 00:02:41,448
Well, you haven'’t bitten
down to the cuticle yet.

63
00:02:41,517 --> 00:02:42,448
That'’s a good sign.

64
00:02:42,517 --> 00:02:44,310
Like I didn'’t have
enough studying already.

65
00:02:44,379 --> 00:02:46,034
Now i'’ve got to write
an essay on Hamlet.

66
00:02:46,103 --> 00:02:47,241
This school is killing me.

67
00:02:47,310 --> 00:02:49,551
They expect me to go to
class all day, study all night

68
00:02:49,620 --> 00:02:50,655
and get straight as.

69
00:02:50,724 --> 00:02:52,103
You Don'’t need straight as.

70
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,724
After last semester'’s
grades I do

71
00:02:53,793 --> 00:02:55,482
or else i'’ll lose
my scholarship.

72
00:02:55,551 --> 00:02:56,551
Wow. That'’s rough.

73
00:02:56,586 --> 00:02:57,838
I Don'’t even have a scholarship

74
00:02:57,862 --> 00:02:58,862
hanging over my head

75
00:02:58,896 --> 00:03:00,827
and i'’m already
stressed out enough.

76
00:03:00,896 --> 00:03:02,655
My statistics
class is killing me.

77
00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:05,275
Here comes my professor.
He'’s a complete tyrant.

78
00:03:05,344 --> 00:03:06,379
Congratulations, Sabrina.

79
00:03:06,448 --> 00:03:08,862
You aced another
data analysis test.

80
00:03:08,931 --> 00:03:11,000
You'’ve got a true
gift for numbers.

81
00:03:11,068 --> 00:03:12,965
Do you see what I mean?

82
00:03:13,034 --> 00:03:14,310
What a jerk.

83
00:03:17,827 --> 00:03:19,620
Here'’s my estimated
monthly sales gross.

84
00:03:19,689 --> 00:03:21,793
And here'’s my
projected annual gross

85
00:03:21,862 --> 00:03:23,241
with a pudding stain on it.

86
00:03:23,310 --> 00:03:24,413
Gross.

87
00:03:24,482 --> 00:03:26,793
Hilda, if you want
to turn a profit

88
00:03:26,862 --> 00:03:28,758
you'’re going to
have to cut costs.

89
00:03:28,827 --> 00:03:30,172
Salem: Or if you really want

90
00:03:30,241 --> 00:03:31,517
to make some serious moola

91
00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:33,413
talk to my investment
counselor, sid.

92
00:03:33,482 --> 00:03:34,758
Man: Hello?

93
00:03:34,827 --> 00:03:39,241
Yeah, sid, put me down for
$100 on run like hell in the fifth.

94
00:03:46,689 --> 00:03:49,586
Hey, Morgan, you almost ready?

95
00:03:49,655 --> 00:03:51,310
Morgan: One more minute.

96
00:03:51,379 --> 00:03:52,758
I'’m layering my scent.

97
00:03:52,827 --> 00:03:55,103
I Don'’t want to know
what that means.

98
00:03:55,172 --> 00:03:57,827
Okay, how does this sound?

99
00:03:57,896 --> 00:03:59,586
"Hamlet, the young Danish prince

100
00:03:59,655 --> 00:04:01,793
is possibly one of
Shakespeare'’s most..."

101
00:04:01,862 --> 00:04:04,068
Most... most...

102
00:04:04,137 --> 00:04:06,344
Most repetitive characters?

103
00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,965
Okay, so now you'’re
making fun of me.

104
00:04:08,034 --> 00:04:09,551
Like i'’m not under
enough pressure.

105
00:04:09,620 --> 00:04:11,000
If I read this play
one more time

106
00:04:11,068 --> 00:04:12,344
my brain'’s going to explode.

107
00:04:12,413 --> 00:04:15,724
Well, now you'’ve officially
graduated to madness 102.

108
00:04:15,793 --> 00:04:17,896
[ Doorbell rings]

109
00:04:19,655 --> 00:04:21,896
Ryan, come on in.Thanks.

110
00:04:21,965 --> 00:04:23,310
Let me guess,
you'’re here because

111
00:04:23,379 --> 00:04:26,000
you'’re having as much trouble
with this Hamlet paper as I am?

112
00:04:26,068 --> 00:04:28,206
Uh, no. Morgan'’s fixing
me up with a friend of hers.

113
00:04:28,275 --> 00:04:29,655
We'’re doubling
with her and Josh.

114
00:04:29,724 --> 00:04:31,344
Oh, hey, Ryan.
Hey, how'’s it going?

115
00:04:31,413 --> 00:04:33,137
How do you have time
to go out on a date?

116
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,941
Don'’t tell me you already
finished your paper?

117
00:04:34,965 --> 00:04:36,010
I'’ll do it after the date.

118
00:04:36,034 --> 00:04:37,941
You know what they say,
"all work and no play..."

119
00:04:37,965 --> 00:04:39,245
Leads to the
eventual destruction

120
00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:40,310
of the cerebral cortex.

121
00:04:41,689 --> 00:04:44,275
Maybe it'’s just my family.

122
00:04:44,344 --> 00:04:45,551
All ready.

123
00:04:45,620 --> 00:04:48,206
Morgan, we'’re just going
to Denny'’s for a burger.

124
00:04:48,275 --> 00:04:50,379
You never know who
you might run into.

125
00:04:50,448 --> 00:04:52,068
Yeah, there might
be a fry cook there

126
00:04:52,137 --> 00:04:54,206
that can put you on the
cover of mademoiselle.

127
00:04:54,275 --> 00:04:55,344
[ Laughs]

128
00:04:55,413 --> 00:04:56,586
Come on, guys.

129
00:04:56,655 --> 00:04:58,551
See ya later.

130
00:04:58,620 --> 00:04:59,620
What'’s up with that?

131
00:04:59,655 --> 00:05:02,000
Yeah, I didn'’t smell
any layers in her scent.

132
00:05:02,068 --> 00:05:03,344
Not her, Ryan.

133
00:05:03,413 --> 00:05:05,068
Now he smelled good.

134
00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:06,793
He knocks off his
paper in his spare time

135
00:05:06,862 --> 00:05:08,382
and mine'’s going
to take me all night.

136
00:05:08,448 --> 00:05:09,551
I must be really stupid.

137
00:05:09,620 --> 00:05:11,000
Well, first of all,
you Don'’t know

138
00:05:11,068 --> 00:05:13,034
what Ryan'’s work looks
like when he turns it in.

139
00:05:13,103 --> 00:05:15,000
Second of all, college
is stressful enough.

140
00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:17,034
Don'’t add to it by trying
to compare yourself

141
00:05:17,103 --> 00:05:18,137
to everybody else.

142
00:05:18,206 --> 00:05:19,846
I hate to break it to
you but that'’s what

143
00:05:19,896 --> 00:05:21,182
the whole grading
system'’s about.

144
00:05:21,206 --> 00:05:22,241
Oh, well, in that case...

145
00:05:22,310 --> 00:05:23,655
What are you talking to me for?

146
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:25,068
You got a paper to write, missy.

147
00:05:29,310 --> 00:05:31,172
Hey, Morgan.

148
00:05:31,241 --> 00:05:33,344
By the look of last night'’s
eye shadow on your chin

149
00:05:33,413 --> 00:05:34,827
i'’m guessing the
evening went well.

150
00:05:34,896 --> 00:05:36,413
Oh, it was fantastic.

151
00:05:36,482 --> 00:05:38,827
We all ended up at this
party till 4:00 in the morning.

152
00:05:38,896 --> 00:05:40,310
Really? That'’s
about the same time

153
00:05:40,379 --> 00:05:43,137
that roxie got done with
her hamletpaper. Wow.

154
00:05:43,206 --> 00:05:46,344
You know, if I liked her more,
i'’d sort of feel bad for her.

155
00:05:46,413 --> 00:05:47,965
Roxie works her
tail off for her gpa.

156
00:05:48,034 --> 00:05:49,965
How is Ryan able to
go out and party all night

157
00:05:50,034 --> 00:05:51,137
and still get good grades?

158
00:05:51,206 --> 00:05:53,103
Hello, star pitcher
for the baseball team?

159
00:05:53,172 --> 00:05:55,586
Hello, Don'’t understand what
that has to do with anything.

160
00:05:55,655 --> 00:05:57,517
Sabrina, you are so naive.

161
00:05:57,586 --> 00:06:00,310
The school grades
athletes way easier.

162
00:06:00,379 --> 00:06:03,793
Plus the coaches encourage
those guys to take cake classes

163
00:06:03,862 --> 00:06:05,275
which are guaranteed as.

164
00:06:05,344 --> 00:06:07,241
Like bowling
and lifestyle skills

165
00:06:07,310 --> 00:06:08,758
which, by the way, I aced.

166
00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,034
Giving any student that kind

167
00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,241
of preferential treatment
is totally unethical.

168
00:06:12,310 --> 00:06:13,965
[ Yawns]: Yeah.
Anyway. Whatever.

169
00:06:15,068 --> 00:06:16,827
Hey, aunt Zelda

170
00:06:16,896 --> 00:06:19,172
have you ever been told to
take it easier academically

171
00:06:19,241 --> 00:06:20,413
on star athletes? No.

172
00:06:20,482 --> 00:06:22,941
Although, I must admit I Don'’t
get a lot of middle linebackers

173
00:06:22,965 --> 00:06:24,310
taking advanced
quantum mechanics.

174
00:06:24,379 --> 00:06:25,379
Why do you ask?

175
00:06:25,413 --> 00:06:27,044
It seems to be a
practice that goes on here

176
00:06:27,068 --> 00:06:28,068
with certain teachers.

177
00:06:28,137 --> 00:06:29,379
[ Gasps]: That'’s appalling.

178
00:06:29,448 --> 00:06:30,931
You know the same thing happened

179
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,931
with the varsity
jousters in high school.

180
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,517
In alchemy, Merlin just
let them pull as out of a hat.

181
00:06:35,586 --> 00:06:37,034
Did you do anything about it?

182
00:06:37,103 --> 00:06:39,172
When was the last
time you saw a jouster?

183
00:06:47,344 --> 00:06:49,379
This calls for a
closer inspection.

184
00:06:49,448 --> 00:06:50,620
Much closer.

185
00:06:56,689 --> 00:06:57,793
Roxie'’s paper.

186
00:06:57,862 --> 00:07:00,310
She'’ll definitely get an "a."

187
00:07:02,137 --> 00:07:04,586
Hey. She worked
really hard on that.

188
00:07:05,689 --> 00:07:07,517
And that tickles.

189
00:07:20,275 --> 00:07:22,896
An "a" for party
boy, that'’s insane.

190
00:07:22,965 --> 00:07:24,793
I'’ll fix that.

191
00:07:24,862 --> 00:07:26,655
[ Sabrina grunting]

192
00:07:31,310 --> 00:07:34,103
Okay.

193
00:07:34,172 --> 00:07:35,413
That'’s more like it.

194
00:07:39,310 --> 00:07:41,517
Ow. Hey. Watch the earrings.

195
00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:43,103
Hey! Hey!

196
00:07:45,413 --> 00:07:46,793
No, no!

197
00:07:46,862 --> 00:07:50,551
This is the last time
I buy from staples.

198
00:07:50,620 --> 00:07:53,689
I wonder if there'’s any
dramamine in that drawer.

199
00:07:54,793 --> 00:07:56,103
Too late.

200
00:07:56,172 --> 00:07:57,586
[ Grunts]

201
00:08:08,206 --> 00:08:10,724
Sabrina, you'’ve been
working on that article for hours.

202
00:08:10,793 --> 00:08:12,241
Can I get you anything?

203
00:08:12,310 --> 00:08:14,758
Either a solution to unfair
grading practices for athletes

204
00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:16,448
or a pumpkin bagel.

205
00:08:16,517 --> 00:08:17,758
Pumpkin bagel coming up.

206
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,103
Hey, where are
the pumpkin bagels?

207
00:08:22,172 --> 00:08:23,965
In the pumpkin bagel patch?

208
00:08:24,034 --> 00:08:25,689
Huh?

209
00:08:25,758 --> 00:08:27,517
In the interest of
lowering overhead

210
00:08:27,586 --> 00:08:30,275
we are no longer in the
exotic carbohydrate business.

211
00:08:30,344 --> 00:08:32,379
From now on, all we
sell are plain bagels

212
00:08:32,448 --> 00:08:33,517
and glazed doughnuts.

213
00:08:33,586 --> 00:08:37,344
Hilda, we have an eclectic,
sophisticated clientele.

214
00:08:37,413 --> 00:08:39,103
A lot of the people
who come in here

215
00:08:39,172 --> 00:08:41,551
look forward to their
cran-apple poppy seed scones.

216
00:08:41,620 --> 00:08:42,620
They may like them

217
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,655
but in order for me
to turn a decent profit

218
00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:46,206
I would have to
charge separately

219
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:48,448
for the crans, the apples
and the poppy seeds.

220
00:08:48,517 --> 00:08:50,551
Well, hey, if all you'’re
worried about is profit

221
00:08:50,620 --> 00:08:52,620
why Don'’t you just start
making the cappuccinos

222
00:08:52,689 --> 00:08:53,689
with instant coffee?

223
00:08:53,724 --> 00:08:55,758
Way ahead of you.

224
00:08:55,827 --> 00:08:57,620
You just put in some
hot, steamed mocha mix

225
00:08:57,689 --> 00:08:58,827
sprinkle cinnamon on it.

226
00:08:58,896 --> 00:09:00,448
Nobody will know
the difference...

227
00:09:00,517 --> 00:09:02,000
Except my accountant.

228
00:09:05,620 --> 00:09:08,379
This article of yours is
causing quite a stir on campus.

229
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,620
Oh, well, isn'’t that the
purpose of good journalism?

230
00:09:10,689 --> 00:09:13,206
To shine a light on important
issues and make people think?

231
00:09:13,275 --> 00:09:15,413
Exactly... and rumor has
it the school is going to

232
00:09:15,482 --> 00:09:17,448
crack down on preferential
grading practices.

233
00:09:17,517 --> 00:09:18,551
That'’s great.

234
00:09:18,620 --> 00:09:19,758
I'’m really happy for roxie.

235
00:09:19,827 --> 00:09:21,551
Finally the playing
field will be level.

236
00:09:21,620 --> 00:09:22,931
I'’m very proud of you, Sabrina.

237
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,379
You stood up for what was right

238
00:09:24,448 --> 00:09:26,620
and you didn'’t have to
cast a pox on any jousters.

239
00:09:26,689 --> 00:09:28,448
You deserve a pat on the back.

240
00:09:28,517 --> 00:09:29,724
Hey, there she is.

241
00:09:29,793 --> 00:09:31,206
Nice work, spellman.

242
00:09:31,275 --> 00:09:32,448
Oh, hey, you like my article?

243
00:09:32,517 --> 00:09:33,862
Loved every word.

244
00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:36,413
Thanks to you, i'’m out of the
big playoff game on Saturday.

245
00:09:36,482 --> 00:09:36,896
What?

246
00:09:36,965 --> 00:09:37,896
The coach

247
00:09:37,965 --> 00:09:38,965
just benched me

248
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,413
until I finish all
my assignments.

249
00:09:40,482 --> 00:09:42,275
I hope you'’re
proud of yourself.

250
00:09:42,344 --> 00:09:44,965
You just cost Adams
college the championship.

251
00:09:47,413 --> 00:09:49,310
At least I didn'’t
give anyone a pox.

252
00:09:49,379 --> 00:09:50,310
Way to go, Sabrina.

253
00:09:50,379 --> 00:09:51,896
Because of your stupid article

254
00:09:51,965 --> 00:09:53,896
I can kiss my "a"
in bowling good-bye.

255
00:09:53,965 --> 00:09:55,206
What are you talking about?

256
00:09:55,275 --> 00:09:56,310
You'’re taking bowling?

257
00:09:56,379 --> 00:09:57,965
I needed a cake class
to keep up my gpa.

258
00:09:58,034 --> 00:09:59,310
Bowling was the one course

259
00:09:59,379 --> 00:10:01,793
where I didn'’t have to work
my tail off to get a good grade.

260
00:10:01,862 --> 00:10:03,413
But now because of
you, my teacher says

261
00:10:03,482 --> 00:10:05,517
we actually have to show
up and learn how to bowl.

262
00:10:05,586 --> 00:10:06,700
You'’re really taking bowling?

263
00:10:06,724 --> 00:10:09,379
Yes. And now I have to get
an "a" on the bowling final.

264
00:10:09,448 --> 00:10:10,793
There'’s a bowling final?

265
00:10:10,862 --> 00:10:12,448
There is now.

266
00:10:12,517 --> 00:10:13,862
Look, i'’m sorry, I really am.

267
00:10:13,931 --> 00:10:15,551
I just wanted to
make things fair.

268
00:10:15,620 --> 00:10:16,689
For you, for everybody.

269
00:10:16,758 --> 00:10:17,965
Well, i'’m not everybody.

270
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,172
I'’m just someone who'’s
going to fail bowling

271
00:10:20,241 --> 00:10:21,482
and lose her scholarship.

272
00:10:21,551 --> 00:10:22,689
Thanks a lot, spellman.

273
00:10:24,896 --> 00:10:27,551
Can'’t believe
this is happening.

274
00:10:27,620 --> 00:10:30,206
Can'’t believe
there'’s a bowling final.

275
00:10:37,758 --> 00:10:41,206
One glaze donut and
freeze-dried coffee coming up.

276
00:10:41,275 --> 00:10:42,896
Thank you kindly, son.

277
00:10:42,965 --> 00:10:45,517
So, how much rain you
figure we'’re going to get?

278
00:10:45,586 --> 00:10:47,896
Same amount as when you
asked me five minutes ago.

279
00:10:47,965 --> 00:10:49,758
That'’s true.

280
00:10:49,827 --> 00:10:52,275
Those dang weathermen
never get it right.

281
00:10:52,344 --> 00:10:54,931
How much do you think
weathermen get paid?

282
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,896
The same amount as when
you asked me five minutes ago.

283
00:10:57,965 --> 00:10:59,965
You have a nice day now.

284
00:11:00,034 --> 00:11:02,103
Well, that depends on
the weather, doesn'’t it?

285
00:11:02,172 --> 00:11:03,413
You'’re catching on.

286
00:11:03,482 --> 00:11:05,758
Hilda, this glaze-donut crowd

287
00:11:05,827 --> 00:11:07,517
is driving me crazy.

288
00:11:07,586 --> 00:11:09,827
I'’m ready to beat my head
against the Espresso machine.

289
00:11:09,896 --> 00:11:11,620
Do it quick '’cause
i'’m trading down

290
00:11:11,689 --> 00:11:13,344
to an instant hot
cocoa dispenser.

291
00:11:13,413 --> 00:11:16,172
Thanks to the glaze-donut
crowd, i'’m rolling in dough.

292
00:11:16,241 --> 00:11:17,655
Nothing against making money

293
00:11:17,724 --> 00:11:19,689
but the quality of
conversation in here

294
00:11:19,758 --> 00:11:21,448
has gone from "is
there a god?" To

295
00:11:21,517 --> 00:11:23,517
"are you bass biting
down at the lake?"

296
00:11:23,586 --> 00:11:25,275
I had no idea you
were such an elitist.

297
00:11:25,344 --> 00:11:27,103
You need to embrace
the down-homesiness

298
00:11:27,172 --> 00:11:28,551
of our new customers.

299
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,000
[ Southern accent]:
Hi, Wayne. Huh?

300
00:11:30,068 --> 00:11:31,172
Knee still acting up?

301
00:11:31,241 --> 00:11:32,517
[ Groaning]

302
00:11:32,586 --> 00:11:34,344
Lorene, let me know
which hot dish to bring

303
00:11:34,413 --> 00:11:35,724
to fellowship supper.

304
00:11:35,793 --> 00:11:37,655
[ Gasping]: I love
that new leg, Fred.

305
00:11:37,724 --> 00:11:39,655
Aunt hilda, since when
do you talk like someone

306
00:11:39,724 --> 00:11:41,034
who married their first cousin?

307
00:11:41,103 --> 00:11:44,241
Since it started making me a
pickle barrel of cash. Yeehaw.

308
00:11:44,310 --> 00:11:46,448
Check your I.Q. At the door.

309
00:11:46,517 --> 00:11:50,000
Our new customers
say it'’s looking like rain

310
00:11:50,068 --> 00:11:52,344
over and over and over again.

311
00:11:52,413 --> 00:11:53,965
Well, i'’d rather
hear about the rain

312
00:11:54,034 --> 00:11:56,103
than how i'’m responsible
for Adam'’s star pitcher

313
00:11:56,172 --> 00:11:58,482
not playing in the game
against Emerson on Saturday.

314
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,931
Josh, do you think writing
that article was a mistake?

315
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,206
Absolutely not.

316
00:12:02,275 --> 00:12:04,965
You stuck with your
convictions, you took a stand

317
00:12:05,034 --> 00:12:07,413
you let everybody know
that Sabrina spellman

318
00:12:07,482 --> 00:12:08,827
cares about what'’s right.

319
00:12:08,896 --> 00:12:10,862
Thanks, Josh.

320
00:12:10,931 --> 00:12:12,931
Wait a minute, you Don'’t
care about the principle.

321
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,793
You just want your
school to win on Saturday.

322
00:12:14,862 --> 00:12:17,000
I want justice to win.

323
00:12:17,068 --> 00:12:19,103
And if my school should
benefit in the process

324
00:12:19,172 --> 00:12:20,586
so be it.

325
00:12:20,655 --> 00:12:22,586
[ Southern accent]:
You have a nice day now.

326
00:12:22,655 --> 00:12:23,965
Excuse me.

327
00:12:24,034 --> 00:12:26,448
Any chance it'’s fixin'’
to rain on Saturday?

328
00:12:26,517 --> 00:12:28,517
Could be, '’cause
my knee is actin'’ up.

329
00:12:28,586 --> 00:12:30,551
Course, could be
from the other day

330
00:12:30,620 --> 00:12:31,896
when I bent down funny.

331
00:12:31,965 --> 00:12:33,172
Oh, geez, there it is.

332
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,448
Hey.

333
00:12:45,517 --> 00:12:47,896
Oh... it'’s you.

334
00:12:47,965 --> 00:12:50,620
You'’re not still mad at me
about the game, are you?

335
00:12:50,689 --> 00:12:52,137
No. Now i'’m mad at you

336
00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:54,896
because you put a major
crimp in my social life.

337
00:12:54,965 --> 00:12:57,482
Ryan was going to take
Josh and me to a party

338
00:12:57,551 --> 00:12:59,793
but now he'’s home,
chained to his books.

339
00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,551
Look, I know it seems unfair now

340
00:13:01,620 --> 00:13:04,137
but in 20 years, somebody
somewhere will thank me.

341
00:13:04,206 --> 00:13:05,206
Please, god, I hope.

342
00:13:05,275 --> 00:13:07,000
It certainly won'’t be me.

343
00:13:07,068 --> 00:13:08,793
Me, either.

344
00:13:08,862 --> 00:13:11,344
Thanks to you, I have to study
introduction to bowling theory

345
00:13:11,413 --> 00:13:13,620
for the all-important written
portion of my final exam.

346
00:13:13,689 --> 00:13:15,896
Then i'’ll have exactly one
hour to throw a bowling ball

347
00:13:15,965 --> 00:13:17,379
that doesn'’t land
in the snack bar.

348
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:18,379
I know how to bowl.

349
00:13:18,448 --> 00:13:19,688
I could give you some pointers.

350
00:13:19,724 --> 00:13:20,896
Oh, that'’s a great idea.

351
00:13:20,965 --> 00:13:22,793
Miles is probably
an incredible bowler.

352
00:13:22,862 --> 00:13:24,517
I mean, that is a
face that screams

353
00:13:24,586 --> 00:13:26,034
"I own my own ball."

354
00:13:26,103 --> 00:13:29,137
16 pounds, orange marble
witha monogrammed bag.

355
00:13:29,206 --> 00:13:32,034
You can lift a 16-pound ball
with those scrawny arms?

356
00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:35,000
Believe me, it took
years of conditioning.

357
00:13:35,068 --> 00:13:36,965
Look, it'’s a great
learning opportunity.

358
00:13:37,034 --> 00:13:38,172
Plus, you'’re desperate.

359
00:13:38,241 --> 00:13:39,344
Go!

360
00:13:39,413 --> 00:13:42,000
Fine. I mean, great.

361
00:13:42,068 --> 00:13:44,379
Let me just grab a wrist
guard, chamois and rosin bag.

362
00:13:44,448 --> 00:13:46,241
It only gets better.

363
00:13:49,758 --> 00:13:52,103
Oh! I'’m never
going to learn this!

364
00:13:52,172 --> 00:13:53,448
Sure you will.

365
00:13:53,517 --> 00:13:55,793
It'’s very simple.

366
00:13:55,862 --> 00:13:58,862
First, you step forward
on the right foot.

367
00:13:58,931 --> 00:14:02,172
Extend the ball, going
through a down-swing.

368
00:14:02,241 --> 00:14:05,103
Then, bring the ball
into a back-swing slowly

369
00:14:05,172 --> 00:14:07,793
as the left foot
gradually comes forward.

370
00:14:07,862 --> 00:14:10,758
Then, when you reach
the top of the back-swing

371
00:14:10,827 --> 00:14:12,793
step forward on the right foot

372
00:14:12,862 --> 00:14:15,344
going through a
slide on the left foot.

373
00:14:15,413 --> 00:14:17,862
Then, at precisely the
moment the slide ends

374
00:14:17,931 --> 00:14:20,931
release the ball, thumb
first, and position your hand

375
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:23,689
at approximately a
45-degree angle to your eyes.

376
00:14:23,758 --> 00:14:25,379
And that'’s all there is to it?

377
00:14:27,758 --> 00:14:30,275
No. I like to do a little
dance right about now.

378
00:14:35,034 --> 00:14:37,310
Hey, Salem, have
you seen aunt Zelda?

379
00:14:37,379 --> 00:14:40,379
Since when did I become
her personal secretary?

380
00:14:40,448 --> 00:14:42,379
Which horse do you like better?

381
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:44,551
Shaved Turkey or slap me silly?

382
00:14:44,620 --> 00:14:46,655
I know i'’d like
to slap yousilly.

383
00:14:46,724 --> 00:14:48,620
And i'’d like to shave a Turkey.

384
00:14:48,689 --> 00:14:49,862
The point is

385
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,827
i'’ve got to pick a horse
and call my bookie.

386
00:14:51,896 --> 00:14:53,448
Oh, by the by

387
00:14:53,517 --> 00:14:55,413
i'’ve also got a boatload riding

388
00:14:55,482 --> 00:14:57,137
on the Adams-Emerson game.

389
00:14:57,206 --> 00:14:59,206
Well, I hope you
didn'’t bet on Adams.

390
00:14:59,275 --> 00:15:02,068
Thanks to my article,
the star pitcher can'’t play

391
00:15:02,137 --> 00:15:04,379
and everyone'’s
expecting us to lose big.

392
00:15:04,448 --> 00:15:07,137
[ Gasping]: I'’ve got
to page sid at the track

393
00:15:07,206 --> 00:15:09,000
and tell him I meant Emerson!

394
00:15:09,068 --> 00:15:10,896
God, I hope he'’s still sober.

395
00:15:12,103 --> 00:15:14,241
Hi, honey.

396
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:15,448
I'’m so glad to see you.

397
00:15:15,517 --> 00:15:16,620
I can guarantee

398
00:15:16,689 --> 00:15:18,000
you'’re the only person in town

399
00:15:18,068 --> 00:15:19,172
who said thattoday.

400
00:15:19,241 --> 00:15:20,896
You should be
proud of what you did.

401
00:15:20,965 --> 00:15:22,517
You tried to
correct an injustice

402
00:15:22,586 --> 00:15:23,896
and that'’s truly admirable.

403
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,485
Then why is everyone
looking at me like

404
00:15:25,551 --> 00:15:27,391
i'’m the one who told
Felicity to cut her hair?

405
00:15:27,448 --> 00:15:30,689
Sabrina, you Don'’t do a
selfless thing for the glory.

406
00:15:30,758 --> 00:15:32,517
You do it because it'’s right.

407
00:15:32,586 --> 00:15:35,586
Well, I Don'’t think it'’s right
that roxie lose her scholarship

408
00:15:35,655 --> 00:15:37,275
or for Adams to
lose the big game.

409
00:15:37,344 --> 00:15:39,655
There'’s got to be some
way to set things right.

410
00:15:39,724 --> 00:15:42,448
Well, you could use your
powers to make it rain frogs

411
00:15:42,517 --> 00:15:44,103
but that'’s been done to death.

412
00:15:44,172 --> 00:15:45,724
What about cats and dogs?

413
00:15:45,793 --> 00:15:47,241
If you think frogs are messy...

414
00:15:47,310 --> 00:15:48,862
Acid rain? No. Too much.

415
00:15:48,931 --> 00:15:50,793
I'’ll come up with something.

416
00:15:58,172 --> 00:16:01,034
Yes! I think i'’m finally
getting the hang of this.

417
00:16:01,103 --> 00:16:02,827
What'’s my score now?

418
00:16:02,896 --> 00:16:05,000
12, in the fifth frame.

419
00:16:05,068 --> 00:16:05,965
Is that good?

420
00:16:06,034 --> 00:16:08,137
Only if you'’re on a respirator.

421
00:16:08,206 --> 00:16:09,689
Guys, how'’s the lesson going?

422
00:16:09,758 --> 00:16:10,803
Do you really want to know?

423
00:16:10,827 --> 00:16:11,827
I Don'’t know. Do I?

424
00:16:12,827 --> 00:16:14,137
My final starts in five minutes

425
00:16:14,206 --> 00:16:15,689
and the only way
i'’m going to pass

426
00:16:15,758 --> 00:16:18,275
is if I run down the alley
and throw myself at the pins.

427
00:16:18,344 --> 00:16:19,344
Do they allow that?

428
00:16:20,344 --> 00:16:22,000
Hey, i'’ve never taken bowling.

429
00:16:22,068 --> 00:16:23,827
I'’m telling you,
you can do this.

430
00:16:23,896 --> 00:16:25,379
I showed you all the moves.

431
00:16:25,448 --> 00:16:26,724
You just have to relax.

432
00:16:26,793 --> 00:16:29,241
My scholarship'’s going
right into the gutter.

433
00:16:29,310 --> 00:16:30,793
How am I supposed to relax?

434
00:16:30,862 --> 00:16:31,896
I may have a way.

435
00:16:31,965 --> 00:16:33,206
Roxie'’s too uptight, we know.

436
00:16:33,275 --> 00:16:34,965
Chill her out, so she
can bowl like a pro.

437
00:16:57,482 --> 00:16:58,620
Very nice!

438
00:16:58,689 --> 00:16:59,793
Got to go.

439
00:17:06,620 --> 00:17:08,379
[ Knocking at door]

440
00:17:08,448 --> 00:17:10,000
[ Sighs]

441
00:17:12,758 --> 00:17:14,551
Okay, let me start
by saying i'’m sorry.

442
00:17:14,620 --> 00:17:15,689
Now that that'’s done

443
00:17:15,758 --> 00:17:17,000
let'’s get down to business.

444
00:17:17,068 --> 00:17:17,896
Excuse me?

445
00:17:17,965 --> 00:17:19,045
You got to finish your work

446
00:17:19,103 --> 00:17:20,517
and bring your
grades up by Saturday

447
00:17:20,586 --> 00:17:21,655
and i'’m here to help.

448
00:17:21,724 --> 00:17:22,862
You want to help?

449
00:17:22,931 --> 00:17:24,531
Turn around, and
walk back out that door.

450
00:17:24,586 --> 00:17:26,862
Okay, Ryan, look, you'’re
probably so overwhelmed

451
00:17:26,931 --> 00:17:28,517
you Don'’t even
know where to begin

452
00:17:28,586 --> 00:17:30,344
and you'’ve probably
forgotten how to study

453
00:17:30,413 --> 00:17:31,793
you'’ve skated by for so long.

454
00:17:31,862 --> 00:17:34,275
And you'’re certainly not going
to get anywhere by doodling

455
00:17:34,344 --> 00:17:35,448
"I hate Sabrina."

456
00:17:35,517 --> 00:17:38,172
Yeah, well, what
am I supposed to do?

457
00:17:38,241 --> 00:17:40,413
First of all, never spell
"Sabrina" with three ns.

458
00:17:40,482 --> 00:17:42,448
Second of all, the sooner
we open these books

459
00:17:42,517 --> 00:17:44,379
the sooner you'’ll be
on that playing field.

460
00:17:44,448 --> 00:17:46,413
I Don'’t think that'’s
going to happen.

461
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,206
Sit down, and
let'’s talk Hamlet.

462
00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:50,000
So, I finally break down

463
00:17:50,068 --> 00:17:52,827
and get myself one
of them ridin'’ mowers

464
00:17:52,896 --> 00:17:54,103
and what happens?

465
00:17:54,172 --> 00:17:55,551
It rains for days

466
00:17:55,620 --> 00:17:57,310
so I can'’t mow my lawn.

467
00:17:57,379 --> 00:17:59,206
It'’s the darndest thing.

468
00:17:59,275 --> 00:18:00,448
"The darndest thing"?

469
00:18:00,517 --> 00:18:02,827
I'’ll tell you what'’s
the darndest thing.

470
00:18:02,896 --> 00:18:04,172
This conversation

471
00:18:04,241 --> 00:18:06,758
and every conversation
i'’ve had in this place

472
00:18:06,827 --> 00:18:09,034
since you glaze-donut
people took over.

473
00:18:09,103 --> 00:18:11,586
All you talk about is
the weather, your fish

474
00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:13,034
and your farm equipment.

475
00:18:13,103 --> 00:18:14,689
I Don'’t care about profits.

476
00:18:14,758 --> 00:18:17,310
I want my cran-apple
poppy-seed people back.

477
00:18:17,379 --> 00:18:18,620
Cran-apple poppy seed?!

478
00:18:18,689 --> 00:18:19,689
That'’s crazy talk!

479
00:18:19,758 --> 00:18:20,758
Oh, yeah?

480
00:18:20,793 --> 00:18:22,206
Well, how'’s this
for crazy talk?

481
00:18:22,275 --> 00:18:24,241
Skeedaddle! Shoo! Shoo!

482
00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:26,241
Y'’all, Don'’t come
back now, ya hear?

483
00:18:26,310 --> 00:18:28,000
And take this complimentary jar

484
00:18:28,068 --> 00:18:29,827
of freeze-dried coffee with you.

485
00:18:29,896 --> 00:18:31,655
The missus will
really like this.

486
00:18:31,724 --> 00:18:34,448
[ Sighing] Thanks, boss.

487
00:18:40,655 --> 00:18:43,275
Anyone want some of
my tofu seaweed omelet?

488
00:18:43,344 --> 00:18:44,586
Sure, i'’ll try it.

489
00:18:44,655 --> 00:18:46,620
Ooh, it'’s not to eat

490
00:18:46,689 --> 00:18:48,241
it'’s a deep-cleaning
facial mask.

491
00:18:48,310 --> 00:18:50,724
That explains the
witch Hazel aftertaste.

492
00:18:50,793 --> 00:18:52,413
Hi.

493
00:18:52,482 --> 00:18:53,482
Nighty-night.

494
00:18:53,517 --> 00:18:54,557
Hold on... it'’s 9:00 A.M.

495
00:18:54,586 --> 00:18:55,734
Where'’ve you been all night?

496
00:18:55,758 --> 00:18:56,689
Ryan'’s dorm room.

497
00:18:56,758 --> 00:18:58,206
What?! what?!

498
00:18:58,275 --> 00:18:59,517
We were just studying.

499
00:18:59,586 --> 00:19:00,758
Yeah. Right.

500
00:19:00,827 --> 00:19:03,310
Like i'’ve never
used that one before.

501
00:19:03,379 --> 00:19:04,620
Relax.

502
00:19:04,689 --> 00:19:06,448
I was helping him
catch up with his classes.

503
00:19:06,517 --> 00:19:08,872
He'’s halfway through... it'’s
up to him to go the distance.

504
00:19:08,896 --> 00:19:10,416
Speaking of which...
I'’m not a witch!

505
00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:11,275
Excuse me?

506
00:19:11,344 --> 00:19:12,551
Sorry. I'’m really tired.

507
00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:13,827
Did you say something?

508
00:19:13,896 --> 00:19:16,379
I passed my bowling
final with flying colors.

509
00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,137
That'’s great! Congratulations.

510
00:19:18,206 --> 00:19:20,000
Yeah. I'’ll be able to
keep my scholarship.

511
00:19:20,068 --> 00:19:22,586
And you know what? It was
kind of fun learning a new skill.

512
00:19:22,655 --> 00:19:23,965
I have much to teach you.

513
00:19:24,034 --> 00:19:26,275
Just think of me as
your personal Yoda.

514
00:19:26,344 --> 00:19:30,034
Or we could just
stick with "hey, you."

515
00:19:36,965 --> 00:19:38,551
Oh, hey, roxie. Hey, miles.

516
00:19:38,620 --> 00:19:40,827
Why are you dressed
like ray Charles?

517
00:19:40,896 --> 00:19:42,655
Oh, I just came to
slip into my 3:00 class

518
00:19:42,724 --> 00:19:43,862
and slip out with my life.

519
00:19:43,931 --> 00:19:45,931
That is, unless Ryan
turned in his work on time

520
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,413
and things are back to normal.

521
00:19:47,482 --> 00:19:50,931
Hey, spellman, I hope you
trip over your laptop and die.

522
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,827
Well, at least you
guys appreciate me.

523
00:19:52,896 --> 00:19:55,517
It'’s good to know I still
have friends I can count on.

524
00:19:55,586 --> 00:19:56,931
We'’re here for you, Sabrina.

525
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:58,137
Through thick and thin.

526
00:19:58,206 --> 00:19:59,448
Hey, Sabrina...

527
00:19:59,517 --> 00:20:00,517
We'’re out of here.

528
00:20:01,724 --> 00:20:03,137
I'’ve got good news.

529
00:20:03,206 --> 00:20:04,389
I handed in all my assignments

530
00:20:04,413 --> 00:20:05,596
and I get to play on Saturday.

531
00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:06,724
Did everyone hear that?

532
00:20:06,793 --> 00:20:08,931
Ryan gets to play in the
game on Saturday! Woo-hoo!

533
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,275
Ow!

534
00:20:10,344 --> 00:20:13,310
How am I going to
pitch if I can'’t see?

535
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:15,275
I can'’t believe I lost
the championship twice

536
00:20:15,344 --> 00:20:16,827
and it hasn'’t even
been played yet.

537
00:20:16,896 --> 00:20:19,379
I was just having
some fun with you.

538
00:20:19,448 --> 00:20:20,620
But to be on the safe side...

539
00:20:20,689 --> 00:20:23,068
Do you think you could stay
away from the field on Saturday?

540
00:20:23,137 --> 00:20:25,793
Yeah, anything I can do to
be a good athletic supporter.

541
00:20:27,068 --> 00:20:28,448
Gotta go.

542
00:20:32,241 --> 00:20:33,862
Announcer: Adams
leads, one to nothing.

543
00:20:33,931 --> 00:20:35,379
It'’s bottom of the
ninth, two outs.

544
00:20:35,448 --> 00:20:36,931
Emerson'’s down
to their last chance.

545
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,344
Johnson steps up to the plate...

546
00:20:38,413 --> 00:20:40,137
Go, Emerson!

547
00:20:40,206 --> 00:20:42,034
Knock it out of
the park, Johnson!

548
00:20:42,103 --> 00:20:44,275
Both: No batter, no
batter, no batter... hey!

549
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:45,862
You know what I
love about baseball?

550
00:20:45,931 --> 00:20:48,241
It'’s all part of the game to
be abusive and obnoxious.

551
00:20:48,310 --> 00:20:50,206
You know what I
like best? The snacks.

552
00:20:50,275 --> 00:20:51,448
Hey, peanuts over here.

553
00:20:51,517 --> 00:20:52,758
[ Salem grunts]

554
00:20:52,827 --> 00:20:53,827
Thanks, Salem.

555
00:20:53,862 --> 00:20:55,068
How can you eat legumes

556
00:20:55,137 --> 00:20:57,000
when there'’s so
much riding on this?

557
00:20:57,068 --> 00:20:58,344
Salem, it'’s just a game.

558
00:20:58,413 --> 00:20:59,413
To you.

559
00:20:59,448 --> 00:21:00,482
To me, it'’s the chance

560
00:21:00,551 --> 00:21:02,275
to become fabulously wealthy...

561
00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:05,448
Or live as a fugitive and
have my face surgically altered.

562
00:21:05,517 --> 00:21:07,241
Announcer: Johnson
hits the ball deep...

563
00:21:07,310 --> 00:21:09,068
Deep, deep to left field!

564
00:21:09,137 --> 00:21:10,758
Yes, yes, yes!

565
00:21:10,827 --> 00:21:13,103
And it'’s caught!
The game'’s over!

566
00:21:13,172 --> 00:21:14,344
Adams wins![ Salem sobs]

567
00:21:14,413 --> 00:21:15,413
[ Phone ringing]

568
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:17,137
[ Gasps]: That should be sid.

569
00:21:17,206 --> 00:21:19,068
And I should be booking
my plastic surgeon

570
00:21:19,137 --> 00:21:21,482
and the next flight to the
Cayman Islands... toodles.